Noise Neutralizer Gifts

'THanks to this noise barrier I don't hear Eddie's snoring any more!'

"This house is so noisy, I invested in a bigger speaker."

Rational explanations

'I can't hear you - let's repeat the last ten minutes of our extremely irritating conversation'

'Oh it's YOU, Mike! For a moment, I thought I heard the tormented howl of a caged animal!'

Noise abatement society - Hush.

Stopping the Cuckoo Clock.

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

Noisy energy?

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

"Our open-space office really stimulates information sharing when everyone removes their noise-cancelling headphones."

"I'd know my tinnitus anywhere and this isn't it."

Election Cancelling Headphones

I'm beginning to regret the hearing aids.

"My neighborhood is getting too noisy. Traffic, screaming kids, barking dogs … I'm used to living in quiet desperation."

"Use the force to concentrate, Luke. The force and noise cancelling headphones."

'You can't come in to play unless you wear cushions on your feet - My Dad's got a headache!'

A musical instrument shop is positioned next to a silent treatment shop.

'For the next sixty seconds, this station will make an annoying 'BEEEEP' sound....'

'It must be nice having a job where you can work at home.'

Must you always be so negative?

"I find that incessant barking eases the pain."

'Whoever said practice makes perfect never had kids with drum sets.'

Nature Magnified

"O.K., she's sitting down to write in three....two....one...."

Echo Hills - Please bear with us while we lower the decibel level.

Drum School/Sleep Clinic/Fire Alarm Testing Lab

"I hate to say this, but I miss the days when all he did was stare at his phone."

"Shh, too much racket."

"Do you really think installing a solar panel will satisfy the anti-nukes crowd?"

Mass Piano Instruction in Communal Home

'I'm a bird person. If he screams, I put a cover over his cage.'

Planet of the Slightly Irritating Squeaky Things.

Sneeze Police