Ninja Fan Gifts

Martial arts man breaks chair when sitting down.

Ninja.

'You chickened out of much-needed surgery. Now we're forced to perform an invasive procedure.'

'She wasn't a soccer mom after all -- she was a NINJA mom!'

Oh, don't worry about my husband — he's out of town on his silly ninja business.

'Look, you can only do so much!'

Superheroes take a selfie

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

'Hi, my name is Bruce Wayne, but not THE Bruce Wayne!'

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

Stonehenge Explained

Superman flies Batman over a suburban neighborhood.

"Robin, lay off the KFC."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

We have the right to refuse service to those not wearing a mask.

"Which one's yours?"

Best Seller

"I came as soon as I got the message!"

'This is a job for a consultant.'

'Supercat.'

Decapitated coffee.

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'