Nickname Ninja Gifts

"Your first name really Fenderbutt? I think I call you Kemosabe."

"There was apresidential candidate who stole my shtick. I turned him into 'Dopey Donald'."

'Hey, Thunder Thighs, Bean Pole's here!'

'I got lost in between all the classroom trailers at school again.'

Tool Box

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

ACME Balloon Company.

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Martial Arts

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

"I hate negative numbers, and I'll stop at nothing to avoid them."

Best Seller

I've found a loophole in your loophole

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

"That's more like it Perkins..!!"

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

'I'm not comfortable with his method of fixing our balance sheet.'

'Eleven?.. you mean there's more numbers beyond the number of fingers we have?'

'Henry, I'm here to trim back your budget.'

Propping up a profits chart.

"The red bars represent the obscene numbers this quarter. The black bars are censoring those red bars."

'We're in good shape. Nobody understands our financial statement.'

"I only see the tech guru and the financial wizard. No sign of the systems ninja."

Customer Complaints - "Thank you, Thompson, for collecting the statistics."

'For people to think we just pluck figures out of THIN AIR is RIDICULOUS, we use a bucket.'

IRS tax instructions.

"We supply the exercise and nutrition program, but it's up to you to supply the narcissism."

"Easy day at school. Spelling was easy as ABC, math was easy as one two three, and music was easy as Do Re Mi."

"Actually, this is where there was a slight earth tremor."

"Building a ninja-attracting business culture is easy. Keeping them focused on equity-based financial analysis? Not so easy."

'Wish you would've warned me about this. I hate getting ambushed.'

Ninja.