Nfl Gifts

"You'll get a lot of head injuries but, on the plus side, you won't remember any of them."

The Groundhog didn't see his shadow...because the superdome lights were out.

'They're gonna punt. ... Release the special teams.'

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

'Everything else was sold out. Stop whining about the end zone seats.'

"This new NFL video is great! It factors in the strength of each team's offense, defense, special teams and legal teams."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"He always get emotional when th super bow;'s on and the end of football season is finally here..."

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

"May the best team win and could we please get through this game without some kind of controversy?"

Detroit Lions fan psychiatric patient

"Edgar isn't here. He's working out with the Dallas Cowboys."

'My dad is very nice unless you fumble a football.'

'Hurry! We've got one last chance to score! You're our only hope!!'

"The Browns are the only team in the NFL to have a malpractice squad."

Another football season comes to an end.

"Too mean for hell?....Welcome to heaven, Mr. Butkus."

Earl Campbell

Fan-Centric Stadium

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

"Trump vs Biden. Chiefs vs 49ers. On the brink of war with Iran. Didn't we do this all in 2020?"

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

Pessimists v Optimists.

'Now what?!'

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

Football.

Punishment for the kicker.

NFL quarterback slides feet-first to the ground and avoids a mugging,

Snowman Football Fan.

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

'He's checking with his agent to see if it's okay to score a try!'

Before instant replay.

NFL linebackers are identified in early infancy and sent away to the secret academy until puberty.