New Home Furnishings Gifts

"The Hendersons have just had a new carpet fitted - so no accidents please. . ."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

Interior design trends for parents....

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"Surprise!"

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"The knights of the round accent table"

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

'Adam and Eve in the garden of Sweden'

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

Leda knew it was serious when the visited Ikea together.

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

Man reads a book while seated in a loveseat as a cat peers over the seat at him.

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'