Net Neutrality Nerd Gifts

Net Neutrality

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The Computer Bore

WiFi Signals

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

Obsession with the Internet.

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"I'm being heavily recruited by several other companies."

Robot Grabber Arcade Game Machine

I work for a not for profit business. Mind you, two years ago it was a 'for profit' business.

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

"Sorry it's late. I got caught in Spring migration."

'I didn't have a glass ceiling I had to break through... I had a golf course I had to conquer.'

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

And elevator with 'up', 'down', and 'pitches' buttons

Cell phones seem as if they are designed for a T-Rex!

Primordial Schmooze

"I don't know who will be obsolete first, me or my computer."

"You knew I was high maintenance when we met."

"After finally discovering that we exist, you would think you would have something more important to ask than if we had Roku."

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

We've Placed These Cookies Here To Learn More About You.

'So, summing up: we 'like' you and you 'like' us.'

"I see you had the foresight to like us on facebook."

'look at my new business cards! The old ones weren't big enough for all my information.'

'Do you know where your phone charger is? . . . I know where mine is.'

"And the tech guy said not to worry if I lost my phone. There's an app for that..."

Media Darling.

'If you increase the magnification another million times you can see the safety regulations.'

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

"He's networking again!"

"Whither NATO?"