Networking Nerds Gifts

Absent Friends Reunited.

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The Computer Bore

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

Go team!

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

Obsession with the Internet.

WiFi Signals

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

Trade Show Sherpas

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

'Impressive resume, We'll verify it through Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr and get back to you,'

'Remember, Henson; we're not here to hobnob - we're here to schmooze.'

"New studies show that the so-called 'lucky man' made popular by the prog-rock band Emerson, Lake and Palmer was, in fact, just very well-connected."

"I'm being heavily recruited by several other companies."

Neuro, Biology, Chemistry, Feedback, Psychology, Technology, Physiology Institute

Robot Grabber Arcade Game Machine

I work for a not for profit business. Mind you, two years ago it was a 'for profit' business.

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

The Card Flinger

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

'All right, I wanna know which one of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

"Sorry it's late. I got caught in Spring migration."

"Oh, go on Jeffrey. . . Give him an order!"

'An application won't be necessary, Sir. . . if you did it, we know about it.'

At the printers - "Business is booming I need 6 more business cards, ASAP."

Over enthusiastic headhunter

'I didn't have a glass ceiling I had to break through... I had a golf course I had to conquer.'

And elevator with 'up', 'down', and 'pitches' buttons

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

Bob tried networking – and crashed it.

"I don't know who will be obsolete first, me or my computer."

"Does 14 followers on Twitter count as 'leadership experience'?"