Neighborhood Chatterbox Gifts

'If it wasn't for rumours you'd be speechless!'

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

Moo Out Loud

'He's great, he can even fetch the paper. Off the neighbour's step.'

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

'I don't like her line of gossip - it's never about anyone I know.'

Second-hand Slander and Innuendo £10

The Exhaustive Bro Catch Up

'Looks like housing starts are up.'

'What do you mean I've wolfed that down? You've never stopped nattering!'

'Dog got your clog?'

'Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?...'

The Consequences of an Interrupted Shower.

One giant bark for dogkind.

'Can't we ever just have a conversation?'

At Gossips Anonymous...

Mummies and babies having a natter over lunch.

'Honey, it's not the Feds. It's the pseudo-feds.'

"Me, I love vacuuming: it makes the dog next door barking mad! Works every time..."

The Life of a Sentient Rock

"Who's up for some commercially successful music?"

"So does George still enjoy his woodworking?"

'John... is that a collar?'

"If you think I talk too much, you should come right out say so! That way we can talk about it."

Time for Tea

'Tell me a little bit about yourself.'

'That dress certainly matches your eyes.'

Verbal blogger.

'Not faster than sound, Pete, think of the neighbors!'

The Burbs

Bla Bla Bla

'Freddie doesn't hold court here anymore. He moved to the Full ‘O Crap Tap Room and on up to the Wind Bag Martini Bar.'

'Do you get the feeling there isn't much substance in most conversations?'