Naval Humor Lover Gifts

A mine in a bowl of soup

Sir Joseph Porter, KCB, First Lord of the Admiralty HMS Pinafore

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Ticket and passport, please."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Late Night with Patrick O'Brian

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

Dead Men Tell No Tales.

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

'I told you we should have unionized.'

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

'I think we should wake the Captain!'

"It was an accident! How many times must I apologize?"

"Isn't it obvious how he got the job? He 'suctioned' up."

"Oh. . . What shall we do with a sunken trailer?"

"Damn it, doesn't anybody on this ship have depth perception?"

Sailor's pipe is a ship's funnel.

'Oh no! Not 'Barnacle Bill the Sailor', again.'

The skipper never wears a hat that fits. He's always been afraid of cap-sizing!

'It's bad news for the cabin boy.'

The guardrail brings it up to code.

"Have you got an immoral compass? We're looking for a night of fun!"

"You've taken some creative liberties, Noah."

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'First of all, Eddie, most people don't usually lose theah boats...'

'I just think it might be a bit too jolly for the captain's taste.'

"After the life he's had, he just said 'What the hell'..."

'Long periods of inactivity are not good for a pirate like you, Cap'n. You're taking root.'

'Petty Officer why does Jenkins keep shouting 'ice cream' from the lookout? Is he drunk? Put him on a charge when he comes down.'

"Stop repeating everything I say birdbrain!"

"Rats, we can't bow ride this one: it's a hovercraft..."

Yeah, well, hindsight is 20/0.

' You'll have to come see my weekend place in Cornwall.'