Naval Contractor Gifts

F&E Submarine Contractors. When we ask the government for assistance, we should avoid calling it a "bailout."

Servicemen.

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

How the US Succeeded in Afghanistan

COWMIKAZES

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Hello, you've reached the private line of the Secretary of Defense. At last! We tried calling you all day yesterday to alert you to an imminent threat. How did you get this number? It was coming straight at your nation-state at speeds approaching Kebin 2. What are you talking about? What's "Klebin 2"? Apologies. In earthlingese that would be "mach 23," or 24.140.16 kilometers per hour. Good lord! I'd better wake ... Not to worry. Our sensors locked on to it as soon as it launched from your North

AUKUS Deal Annoys France

"Worst budget cuts ever!"

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

'It was only a joke. I never thought they's accept me.'

"Sir, our hood ornament is slowing us down."

'I've been tagged by a whaling commission, some environment people, a naval research team, a fishing group,some zoologists...'

The House Always Wins

Admiral in the bath.

Tank. Building this vehicle will create jobs and stimulate growth! He's given new meaning to the phrase "The economy's in the tank"!

How To Cut The Defense Budget

Your Country Needs MOO!

"Ah, Master Turnip, I see you're on a defence contract too!"

Robo Sapiens

"Today U.S. Defense Industry stocks rose on news Dick Cheney endorsed Donald Trump."

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

"Tell Congress we need a super duper hypersonic missile."

Cyberwarfare

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

Remounts for the Yeomanry

'Honda has recalled the U.S. Sixth Fleet due to leaky sunroofs.'

"I'd like to report this stowaway I discovered two weeks ago, Captain."

Bomb Back Better

"Unfortunately, what we thought to be the black box turned out to be the navy blue box"

'Oops! Butter-fingers.'

'What's wrong, people? You wanna be sooper-dooper safe, don't you?'

"We're fighting them in zone A, they're our allies in zone B, and we don't know what to do in zone C."