Nautical Navigation Gifts

Speaking your mind, on a boat ('Bow!'... 'Stern')

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

The fate of the emigrant

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Captain in a storm

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

'Are we there yet?'

"Mind the whale, dear."

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

Long before the GPS, traveling humans found their way around by using an Atlas.

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

'So much for your new Satnav!'

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"It was a lot more satisfying before 'catch and release.'"

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

'I really think we took a wrong turn.'

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Recalculating route..."

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

The Lost World: You are Here

'It's okay - he knows how to use the GPS.'

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

"Admit it, we're lost."

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?