Marine Navigation Gifts

Broken Lighthouse

"It's hard to believe this is the Atlantic. It looks very much like he Pacific."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

The fate of the emigrant

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Captain in a storm

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

"Mind the whale, dear."

'Are we there yet?'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"It was a lot more satisfying before 'catch and release.'"

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

'I really think we took a wrong turn.'

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

"Admit it, we're lost."

The Lost World: You are Here

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

'It's okay - he knows how to use the GPS.'

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

"Recalculating route..."

'So much for your new Satnav!'

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

Goldfish bowl on raft...

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'