Nautical Comedy Enthusiast Gifts

A castawy sees a ship comiing closer and is excited by the prospect of rescue - but the ship plows right through the middle of his island.

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"I like my vodka like I like my ships - on the rocks!"

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Ticket and passport, please."

Recalculating

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Walking the Plank.

Man painting MOM on boat

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

'I told you we should have unionized.'

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

'We're drifting apart.'

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

'I think we should wake the Captain!'

Fish near-death experiences.

'That's his new trophy fishwife.'