Nature Warriors Gifts

"I need some garden work done. A strangling vine of unthinking obedience has completely overgrown my tree of liberty out frint."

The Jeopardy of Progress

City Zoo: Day Care

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

Monkey-artist

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

'I must be reaching that age! I can't get my ozone layer up anymore!'

Bees SOS

"Catching him was easy. Getting him through the cat door....Now that's another story."

Save the unicorn.

"Go ahead if you want to: Me, I'll wait for the bears to be sated before I risk it..."

"Touché"

Climate Change

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'

The Perfect Cannonball

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

'We're a protected species and an endangered speices, but when I see a person, I don't know if he's protecting us or endangering us.'

'Good grief! Aren't you extinct yet?'

"It's trickle down."

"Man! That squirrel was jacked!"

'Hey, Grandma! Watch how long I can hold my breath underwater!'

Wrong leadership.

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

'I don't know about the ecosystem, but the economy seems to be on the upswing.'

Another reason farm raised fish aren't as healthy as wild ones.

"You overwatered the plant, again."