Mythical Misadventure Fan Pillows

The Gods breathed life into the wrong one.

Swiss army knife

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

Hot Tub Frosty

Sometimes it's easy to see if a swamp creature is on vacation.

"Hang on - I'm not as young as I used to be. . .!"

'Are we here-there-be yet?'

"If the jumper cables don't work, I'll pour more motor oil on the keys."

At the end of the rainbow

Mermaid reads sleeping tourists book.

Wotan with eye patch

"Over the river and through a ridiculous detour that has us in the middle of who-knows-where, to Grandfather’s house we go!"

'Look Dad - bigfoot!'

"Omnipotent?! I thought you said impotent. And you're out of wished, too."

Parisian Misguided Tours.

'I said, 'Left after the bunny slope! Left!'.'

'Sorry about that, Miss Delsey. I guess the boat wasn't sinking after all.'

'Well, there went Atlantis -- I told You not to use low bidder!'

"I'd like to see you cut back to eating only two, three ships a day."

'First time skiing?'

'What do you think of as you great achievements?'

"I don't really believe in the tooth fairy anymore, but if it pays, I play!"

Phoenix

I told you I lost it in the sun.

Catch of the day

'I met your father on a fairytale weekend in Yosemite. It was love at first sighting.'

'Oh, hey, relax, I'm not here to take you! I've outsourced all that work long ago. I'm now strictly on the administrative end.'

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

'I'm afraid it's the weather!'

"Great interview! and your credentials are impeccable, there's just one last thing..."

'The instruments are suggesting that the heat pump is receiving a temperature of 105...what could possibly be heating the ground that much?'

One of the dangers of being new to online banking.

'Why do I always get un-friended? I'm a nice troll.'

Painting into a corner.

'Next...Our guest expert claims stocks tend to rise due to gravitational forces of a full moon...'