Romance Misadventure Fan Pillows

"... It's just that when you said you'd got us a date with a pair of sisters... "

Romance

'Silly me. I thought his 'Catch and Release' bumper sticker referred to his philosophy on trout fishing.'

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"Monsieur has just ordered a vasectomy..."

"When you promised me a lift home...."

Husband and wife come out of Tunnel of Love, and man is fishing

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

'Sorry about that, Miss Delsey. I guess the boat wasn't sinking after all.'

'I'm sorry, Frank, but I think I need some space.'

"I once mistakenly thought I was dating someone for a whole month because I couldn't tell his texts were sarcastic."

'First time skiing?'

'It's very nice to meet you, but I prefer to remain anonymous.'

The Adventures of Morton

"This guy has no idea what he's doing."

"You will let me know if I'm boring you with my little stories, won't you dear?"

"The date was a disaster: he grew up with pirates you see, so I couldn't understand half of what he was saying..."

She's a little too friendly.

'Very steamy and sexy novel, Miss Pendergast, but how come that this Latino heart throb only services women over 70?'

'I hate these romance cruises.'

'I can't let you catch me - you need the exercise more than you need sex!'

Bad Medieval first dates.

"It wasn't long into their first date before Toro began to notice the red flags."

Though Mary's date puts her to sleep, she's saved by her airbag.

Geek Todd Jones strikes out with his 3000th wiman to take over third place on the all time geek strikeout list.

Embarrassed man finds a skimpy dress in his suitcase.

"Not tonight, dear. I have a head injury."

'Erica, you're a cutie and I really like you, but your way to do French kissing makes me nervous!'

"Can't you do ANYTHING right?"

'Well, I heard he was a player.'

"Sure, I can tattoo her name there...man, you must really hate your ex-wife!"

A hunter shoots what he thinks is a bird, but turns out to be a big 'm'.

"I know pain, Jessica. I've had my ear pierced."