Mystic Ponderer Gifts

"Hey, that crystal ball's just a snow globe!"

'Hey! The audience wants you to stop sending spam thoughts!'

Ring bell for guru.

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"Why bother?"

Neptune

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

'When we bought this place we thought we'd only be making wine. Apparently, we're also into spirits.'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'You can fill your teddy bear with stuffing or with a demonic spirit summoned from the nether regions.'

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

'Congratulations, you've got the job. Unfortunately though, you'll be constantly late, and we'll fire you in two months.'

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

'I say we try it.'

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"Ok, you were right – dogs can see ghosts."

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"I'll have dessert first."

A voodoo doctor.

'No, this is area 50...Area 51 is over that way...'

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

"Now we're really in trouble!!! It's the Power Walking Dead!!!"

Jesus wept

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

'He's always looking for an argument!'

'You will be reincarnated as someone who undergoes past life regression.'

"I'm afraid Larry sleeps with more than just the fishes."

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

Supernatural book - The Unexplained