Metaphysical Ponderer Gifts

John Donne

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

Chiller Theatre

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

"Needs to get a life"

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

"I'm learning to live with existence."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

Ten Commandments

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"I cross the road to forget."

"Is this who I am?"

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."