Mystic Mischief Makers Pillows

'What's my fortune then?!

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

'okay...where did you hide it?'

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

Newt sale

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

"No Joke! I taught my dog to fetch coffee."

Photobooth Photobomb

"Gesundheit!"

"How the heck could you forget your sword?"

The Tooth Ferret

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

"Here's a buck, kid... Don't tell your mom I snuck out of my retirement home!"

'The man was real nice about it. He gave me my ball back and even said you can expect a nice call from his lawyer.'

"My fella was chucked out of the water-birth for running around the pool and bombing."

'It's a new record, mom - there are six of us in here!'

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

"I think we both know who did it...."

Knights

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

"I guess breakable things need to be more careful around me."

God creates humans.

"So nice to spend a week just ransacking with the kids."

"My dad ate my homework."

"If that's my mom tell her I'm at recess."

'... No, actually. He's short, blond and ugly.'

'The real fun comes when we go through airport security.'

'Stop fooling around, I can hear my dad coming out of the shower...'

Doggie Bowl Drill

'Over on stage number two is the lovely, succulent, Misty Flatulence!'

'We'll soon know whether or not the Easter rabbit is real.'

"Relax. As soon as you get over your fear of heights you're gonna love this."