Muddy Buddy Gifts

Begin by removing all surplus mud.

Glastonbury. After.

"Congratulations, Amruk. You prove they do exist."

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"Hi, kid! Did you watch 'Sesame Street' today?"

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

'Want a mudpie? It's organic!'

"Some day, we should bait our hooks."

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

'Parents are so inconsistent. They spend all day avoiding soil loss and all night promoting it.'

Spring is coming... Sunshine, warmer weather... and MUD

"All yours, Buddy. I'm ALREADY living on house money."

"Jim, just put that hole behind you."

'I guess the transplant went ok - I just got a love letter from my new liver!'

'Fred, we've been together too long!'

'How do I know your ours?'

Down On the Farm

Signs you may be friends with a sheep....

'This plumber you recommended...mate of yours, is he?'

"Don't attack surfers! You're giving us all a bad name and encouraging culling!"

"I don’t know, Phil … my gut tells me she’ll drive you nuts."

"Do you realize that we spend one-third of our lives in bed and the other two-thirds in here?"

'Heel! HEEL! Bad potato!'

'I found a whole bunch of worms in the wheel wells!'

"Okay, which one of you guys filled my bowling ball with helium?"

'Please! Take these and let my buddy go!!'

"Hey Cruz, check out my super-powered speaker system!"

Wipe Your Feet

"No offense."