Movie Executive Gifts

"Look, babe. At this point, you've reinvented yourself so many times you're back to who you were at the start."

"Hey, this is brilliant! Where do you get my ideas?"

Godzilla vs. The Angry Movie Executives

"How's this for an idea — the first hundred-million-dollar independent film!"

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Herman Mankiewicz

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

'Not bad, Ms. Newborn. But take another crack at it, and this time remember that 'earnings-per-share' is the alter upon which all other numbers are sacrificed.'

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

"Yes, we have a retirement plan. It's called a layoff."

"Looks like a pretty quiet night out there, huh, girl?"

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

'And we have an employee wellness program. By not offering health insurance or sick pay, we encourage wellness.'

'It says our line printer is obsolete our remote terminal is obsolete, and I'm afraid, we're obsolete.'