Movie Executive Gifts

"Look, babe. At this point, you've reinvented yourself so many times you're back to who you were at the start."

"Hey, this is brilliant! Where do you get my ideas?"

Godzilla vs. The Angry Movie Executives

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'I've GOT it! - Winnie-the-Pooh VERSUS the Smurfs!'

"How's this for an idea — the first hundred-million-dollar independent film!"

Movie Corporate HQ. He misunderstood -- He heard we need a "box office" smash, so he wrecked his cubicle.

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Herman Mankiewicz

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

BBC - Crisis Management, Damage Control and Liability Supervision.

Film Festival. Events. Screenings. Ernie attends these festivals in costume. He's gone over to the dork side!

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

'Not bad, Ms. Newborn. But take another crack at it, and this time remember that 'earnings-per-share' is the alter upon which all other numbers are sacrificed.'

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

"Yes, we have a retirement plan. It's called a layoff."

This side is the gag reel.

"Looks like a pretty quiet night out there, huh, girl?"

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."