Mounted Police Officer Gifts

"May I see your pony club efficiency certificate?"

Overweight cop and his struggling horse.

The Anti-Agent

Hate Platforms

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

Police Feline Unit

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

America, are we learning anything?

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

Neo-International Law

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

hard-boiled egg...

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"Postwar is hell."

Military Medals

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

Timmy had one heck of a security blanket.

The Circular Logic of Fascism

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

"Don't wait up. I'll be working late again tonight."