Motel Maid Gifts

'Sanitized for your protection.'

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

"Tracy Island offers palatial splendour in the safest of environments. Your beds are unmade because this is Tracy Emin Island."

"The election's over, Trump won, the illegals are being deported and I'm here for one of them there high-paying American jobs he promised."

Cook and her Maids

Slow Night

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Me, I think Master and Mistress are incompetent: why else would they need a butler, 3 maids, 2 cooks, 5 gardeners, a pool boy and 2 personal assistants?"

"The mint on the pillow was nice, but I'd prefer a chocolate fudge brownie."

'It's first flush Darjeeling darling!'

The Suite Hereafter

Hotel with sign 'Home sweet temporary home'

Mini Bar

"A conundrum, rather than an outright mess, I think, Mrs Ellis..."

"Look at the state of this place! Don't you ever use that thing to sweep up?!"

'What if I promise not to look?'

'No Sir, it's not sunny here all the time. Never at night.'

'Bed & Bagel'

'Hello room service - can you come and tuck me in and read me a story please'

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

No early morning tea past this landing

The Inn Keeper's Wife and Daughter taking care of the Don after being beaten and bruised.

A declaration - man tells a girl that she has stolen his heart.

Saying Grace.

"What already?! You're the one who told me I needed professional help."

Mouse Sidewalk Cafe

Special! Continental breakfast...$3.99: 'What continent is this suppose to represent - Antarctica!'

In the art gallery

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

"Welcome to the United States."

Genie in bottle grants maid's wish.