Morning Mischief Enthusiast Gifts

"So this is what you do when I pretend to leave, then come back unexpectedly in five minutes."

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Hey, Jeffrey...I've got a physics question for you...The queen of static electricity is exempt! Hail me!!'

'Get up or I'm sending in the cat.'

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

'This is going to be good, he's taking water balloons into the board meeting.'

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

Hallowe'en wake up call

"When I said 'I'm leaving' this morning I meant for the office"

"I'll have to call you back. The cat looks really pleased with himself, and I gotta find out why."

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

'How do people without a middle name know when the're in trouble?'

"At least she got it to squeak when she tripped over it."

"It feeds blood to our brains...and that makes us smarter!"

"Doreen, the cat's after the parrot again!"

Restroom Practical Joke.

"Mom is pretty certain I'm on my third guardian angel by now."

"You threw the wrench again, didn't you?"

"It's hard to trust those Beanbirds. They're always 'up' to something!"

'Good morning!'

'As near as I can figure something bad happened and they're both in on it.'

Waiter, there's a wireless earbud phone in my soup.

"Dad's half asleep. He was using the fly swatter to flip the pancakes."

'I gave you a few extra stitches - Your husband's idea, really!'

'We had quite a fire drill at school today -- there was looting.'

"Very impressive. . . internet troll."

"Nurse, you've mixed up the helium and oxygen again haven't you ?"

"If you eat the homework, but then spit it out, are you still a bad dog?"

'He's at a very destructive age.'