Morning Meal Warrior Gifts

"Are you ready to pound down some breakfast?"

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

I hate monday mornings.

Business man sees himself as a shark

'Goodbye, dear. This is the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive.'

I grew up vegetarian. Wow. That takes work to stay strong. What motivates you? Hey, lettuce brain! Peer pressure.

"Go back to sleep? Sleep at the office?"

"Apparently, giving up wearing fur wasn't enough!"

'... Got anything besides apples?'

"Awake and doing great"

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

'Hey, a fly! This is supposed to be vegetarian soup.'

"I never have a good excuse to be late: The teacher knows my dad wakes me up at dawn..."

'What's intravenous feeding? My mom says if I don't eat my vegetables, she'd do that to me!'

8 AM in the sleeper elevator car

Little Dark Specks

"It's blank!!"

Mega Corp. Employee Entrance. I like to get to work early, before my brain knows what I'm up to.

We leave Jim alone until he's at least 90% charged. (49%)

You should have come earlier, sir -- we're all out of worms.

"You have some serious bed head, Dear."

"Is it safe to assume that the meat is laced with antibiotics and the salad is chockfull of pesticides?"

'I went for a walk this morning...' - 'I ran 20 miles... uphill.' - '...and I had bran flakes for breakfast.' - 'Yeah, well I ate 19 sausages, 3 melons, and a horse.' - 'I'm going for a pee.' - 'I swear I could flood this place!!'

'For goodness sake, take a mint: You have Spring breath!'

'All right, all right, I'm getting up.'

Cactus Alarm.

In Tray and Out Tray

And as the chrysalis emerged from its nest, she is forced to shed the final layers of her cocoon and brave the world at last.

'I'm going to get up, do the treadmill, walk the dog and leave for work early. What are going to do?'

Bathroom Fashion

"It seems an ungrateful and disrespectful monster has taken over Baldo's brain."

'A simple 'I like mine hard boiled' would have done!'

Amazing new parenting methods...No. 94, preventing obesity.

"I'm taking you off sugar, carbs, red meat, poultry, dairy, non-dairy and anything served in a bucket."