Morning Chaos Champion Gifts

Wind-up Radio

"I don't care how good he is. Ain't nobody can get a short on Jeffrey."

"There's more inside."

Tired Barbie

'How many blummin' shades of black ARE there?'

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

'You got him here before the tardy bell, Mrs. Bates, but I'm not sure he's prepared to learn.'

'Getting my children to get out of bed and go to school was hard - So I bought a cattle-prod...'

Clive would be lost without his morning heart starter.

"It would keep me awake all night, but I'm up for a game of coffee pong first thing in the morning."

In the Days Before Coffee

Good disciplinarian gaining respect vs. scary nutcase.

"I didn't think this shift was ever going to end, YOU are in for a long day my friend, and water-bottle is going to have to come in early."

"One of you will have to remain behind."

"Dad's half asleep. He was using the fly swatter to flip the pancakes."

House with Children - There's my toothbrush!

A severe case of getting up on the wrong side of bed...

The Origin of Laundry Day

'Bill's alarm clocks were going off early today.'

'My husband will be a little late getting to the office, but he's on his way.'

Hot trends on the school run. . .

"How long have I been typing on a waffle maker."

"Good! I see they made the coffee nice and strong this morning."

Man wakes to his bedside digital clock which reads: It's Time.

"The shrimp alfredo you made a few weeks ago?"

Three-Martini Breakfast

"Slow down! You're toasting your Blackberry and talking into a Pop Tart."

'When he finally exhausts his vocabularly that's when I call the plumber.'

'Are we running late.'

The Unalphabetizer

'Wakey,wakey - we don't want to be late for Relate!'

Just a sec...

'Did you wake up late this morning, Sally?'

'I'm camping out here tonight. It's the only way I can guarantee getting into the bathroom in the morning!'

Milkman on Early Morning Round