Monster Caretaker Gifts

"Oh, Irwin, I wish to god you'd get rid of that thing!"

"Sure, it's disgusting, but it's nice to have something that needs me."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Billy would watch his ant farm for hours on end.

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

"I had to skip my workout."

'Off hand I'd say she needs re-stuffing.'

'New Age Dog Park' Dogs commune with Nature.

The Cat Spa

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

Boy whistling at crackers.

'No need to yell son, I may be deaf, but I can still read.'

"If you're sure your son doesn't mind living in a cage and eating pet food then who am I to say no?"

'I really hate cleaning this thing.'

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

Lazy plumber.

"There's no money in your uncle's will. You are, however, directed to maintain his 5 cats and Facebook account."

Dog with a neckerchief feeds dogs in matching nappies.

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

Tortoise polishing his shell

Cleaner playing pool with brush.

Child walking with balloon which represents global warming.

One tends to the sick. The other manages a large estate. Interestingly, a caregiver and a caretaker are not on opposite sides of an interaction.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

"Any improvement since I brought the balloon?"

My Bowl Is Empty.

'My Dad will like you. He's the care-taker at the monkey house in the zoo.'

'Please bow your head and cough. I need to check your hairballs.'

"Relax - it's just for a few days until they find a place of their own."

Vodka

Cleaner with nameplate next to Consultant Surgeon's desk.

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

"The government doesn't understand me."

'Mr. Franklin. What did I tell you about wheelies in the hallway?'

'Tootsie-pie is going to be spaded, just like Mother.'