Modern Mind Theorist Gifts

"We can't imagine what a spider thinks, Louisa, because it's a whole different life style."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

The Googler

"Eat not of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. Its sources have yet to be verified."

Screen Time vs Book Time

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"Will follow you on social media for food."

"I'd like to TikTok your offer and get comments before saying yes or no."

Mark Zuckerberg

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

'Can I download that as a PDF?'

"I've always wanted an empire of Distance Learning Campuses."

'Meditation centre' 'Coffee, Tea, Enlightment, Refreshments'

'I'd go back if I were you.'

'Don't worry about the thumb sucking...she'll be texting with it soon enough.'

'Nothing about the evils of corporate downsizing?'

"If you're trying to find yourself, Mr. Ludlow, just ping your phone."

"You will bargain away what little integrity you have left for what little job security you can gain."

Rodin's THE FEELER

What every man thinks to himself when he puts on a pink shirt.

"Is there a way to disable Narcissus' self-view?"

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

Id/Ego/Superego.

Follow me on Twitter...

'I ink, therefore I am....'

"Remember, it's Boy, Girl, LGBT, Boy, Girl, LG . . ."

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

Like.

"If the headline screams catastrophe, but nobody cares to read it, does it still make a sound?"

"The internet without cat pictures? No way! Make a realistic wish like peace on earth, justice for all, everlasting life, sane politicians..."

"This looks good, Jim, but we'd better run it by legal, Siri, and Alexa."