Modern Marvel Lover Gifts

'And this wearable smartwatch sends a text to my wearable smartglasses to let me know when I'm not wearing any pants.'

Man staring art in the face.

'I wonder how our ancestors managed without all our modern conveniences.'

"His first out-of-body experience."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"...we have a heart-lung-kidney-liver-spleen machine."

'Still have gas problems, Mr. Quigley?'

"Which one's yours?"

New Marvel Heroes

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

"I never actually said I was spiderman...I just said that no one has ever seen us in the same room together."

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

'The donor for your face transplant was a Mr. Bonzo.'

'Perhaps I was a bit too graphic in describing the surgical procedure.'

"We have a cow AND a pig heart valve. Then, we gave him chicken lips, and a farmhand. I recommend you register him with the USDA."

Spider boy

"One thing I can tell you - it's not covid."

The Shoemaker's Appendectomy

Things move fast round here! Including the new processor!

Take your daughter to work day: 'Can you say 'intestines'?'

'Would it kill you to go for a computer upgrade?'

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

"There's been a medical breakthrough that can help your condition. Unfortunately, you need an insurance breakthrough."

'Well, if they don't go chuff chuff anymore. . . how do they go?'

Thank You to Vaccinators

Hold on - it may take a few minutes for his new pacemaker to sync with his Fitbit.

"The surgery went well. You'll be issued a 'Contains No Nuts' card upon discharge."

"You wait twelve month's, and then five come along all at once!"

'I think I have a rash, but being a leopard it's difficult to tell where.'

Aquarium Distress Call.

Ultrasound. . . AKA: Womb Zoom

"Oddly enough it looks like you made 98.6 million last year from the talking medical thermometer you invented."

"Try and stop me if you’ve heard this one before …"

Bonsai farms: 'We started growing normal trees, but it didn't work out!'

Veterinarian at a large animal clinic staring up at a huge beast.