Modern Kid Pillows

"C'mon, time to get up and stare at your devices all day."

'I'm too tired to listen to a story tonight, mom. Just e-mail something and I'll read it tomorrow.'

"Sure, this camp has swimming, games, fishing, horseback riding and rock climbing. But, does it have Wi-Fi?"

"For the last time, there is no virus under your bed."

"I don't need to go trick or treat. I just ordered a bunch of candy on the internet."

"Does it have a keypad?"

Santa delivers Apps

"FYI. . . it's 3 o'clock, not episode 3."

"Don't bother reading the letters. I'll save you the time. They all want the same thing, the new iPhone."

"Abstract Expressionism is definitely right for me at this stage of my career."

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'Hi, Miss Henderson, we did collage in class today. Can you drive me home?'

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

Tamagotchi paralysis.

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

"He just said his first word!"

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

Feeding of a giraffe with the use of a balloon.

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

Kid is 'Born to Text'.

'All good things must come to an end.'

"He's my school project for science class."

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

"I brought frankincense." "I brought gold." "I brought diapers!" "A wise woman!"

'We're beta testing Goo-Goo Glass.'