Modern Hunter-gatherers Gifts

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

Paleo-to-go

'After a hard day hunting, I relax by working my patch of green stuff.'

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

'It appears to be some sort of staff development presentation.'

"Behold, Penny. The 'Wi-Fi dead zone.'"

"So here we are...the great outdoors!"

"Do we HAVE to be omnivores?"

'Yeah, I tried 'Open Sesame' ... then I just went at it with a backhoe.'

Drones Unlimited

"We've finished the hunting and gathering. Let's invent the vacation!"

"Don't bother wasting your money on DNA testing. The results all come back, 'Ape.'"

Danger. No phone signal beyond this point

"Enough with the low-hanging fruit. How about some slow-moving meat?"

"I remember when Christmas shopping made my feet hurt!"

'...But then I ran across a dead mastodon, and gained it all back!'

'It's a vegetarian cave painting.'

A cave man blowing down a blowpipe.

"Why don't you just go to the supermarket like everybody else?"

'Warning - no cell phone service next 20 miles.'

"I'd really like to retire and spend more time gathering."

"Aren't you supposed to get rid of the old mobile, when you buy a new one."

"It ain't fox-hunting, but shooting delivery drones comes close."

'Keeping track of our hunting performance in this way will help us raise standards and increase efficiency!'

Modern Rag and Bone Men.

'Showoff!'

Hunter role reversal.