Modern Horror Fan Gifts

The Tell-Tale Heart 2: Lost Phone On Vibrate

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

Love at First Sight

Transylvanian backpackers.

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

Silence of the Chickens...

Dead Funny

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

Chiller Theatre

Godzillla eating people using telephone poles as chopsticks.

'Well,he certainly has his father's nose!'

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

Solar Frankenstein

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

'Hello, I'm Dr. Frank Stein and this is my anaesthetist, Dr. Ivan Gore. We'll be doing your hernia operation tomorrow.'

I crawled out of a toilet and ate a guy. Say my name 3 times in a mirror. I dare you. No one suspects I'm Slenderman. She took me home. Then she woke up in a tub of ice missing a kidney. Urban Legends-in-Their-Own-Minds.

Doctor Frankenstein creates a new monster that makes the mob even more blood thirsty. Colour

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

Open House of Horrors

"Harry?... Is that you?"

"Really? That's the only game in this house?"

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"