Modern Family Enthusiasts Pillows

"Mom, when you were pregnant with me, did I have a tracking number so you could check on my delivery status?"

"My daughter is a modern baby. She doesn't cry when she is hungry...she texts me."

'Wait until your father gets home.'

"Listen Darling - his first email !"

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Grounded

I love my family!

"Listen. Nobody's cuter than anyone else! You're all equally cute!"

"Use your inside scream."

Mother's Love

It's a Boy

"I couldn't find the phone charger, but I was able to locate all the mouses the kids lost over the years."

'I think babies grow in a mommy's tummy and adopted babies grow in a mommy's heart.'

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies!'

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

'They're a very successful family.'

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

'I'm very confused. I never had a father. I was raised by two mummies.'

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

'It's no use! His computer tablet has replaced his blanky!'

Sliding Down the Banister

Family sitting on sofa.

"It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother."

World's Best Dad. I don't know. I thought they were with you. World's Best Mom.

"How many times do I have to beep you?"

'If he hasn't got a name yet, how do we know he's ours?'

"They're a very hi-tech family. Apparently, even their baby was cordless."

'Hi, honey?we're home!'

'Go forth and multiply!'

"When the new employment laws come in parenting is going to be a whole lot easier...."