Modern Family Enthusiast Pillows

"YOu want to speak to the head of the household? My parents are into shared decision making."

"You just wait until your other mother gets home, young man!"

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies!'

"Will you be our surrogate?"

"I have two mommies. I know where the apostrophe goes."

'Great news, honey-bunny. My divorce finally came through, and I got the kids.'

'In my day we called it 'parenting', not 'troubleshooting your kid'.'

"Listen darling - His first e-mail!"

"I apprecite the effort, dad, but I've already downloaded it to my tablet."

"Oh, no. If you're going to be primary breadwinner, then I get to be primary caregiver."

"I've already told Mom about my day - ask her."

"We wanted them to have contemporary names: this is Omg and Lol."

"Honey, the baby just texted her first word!"

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

"Let's review cause and effect. Your divorce 10 years ago can't affect your son's zero today."

'After all these years you'd think I'd see that coming.'

'She's my only student whose parents are married, and they're gay.'

'Until I met your Mom, yes.'

"You were right. It was a good idea to take a father and son walk. We texted each other the whole way."

'Go ask your other mother.'

'Yup! Lots to give, not much to lose!'

'He wanted a girl just like the girl who married his dad, instead, he got me!'

"On the plus side they're watching less TV now."

"What about instead of your stepdad, you just think of me as a 'gritty reboot'."

Kim, Bill, Ned, Mary, Fred, Miki, Nels, Phaedra, Leonore, Spike and Linda. A non-traditional family.

"How many times do I have to beep you?"

"Son, I think it's about time we had the TED Talk."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

I love my family!

"Listen. Nobody's cuter than anyone else! You're all equally cute!"

"I couldn't find the phone charger, but I was able to locate all the mouses the kids lost over the years."