Modern Fads Pillows

"He'll be a little late. He's working on his Wordle."

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

"Did you see that trimmed-up earlier than thou look on her face, just then?"

"Great, the end of the world and I'm going to be first on facebook with pictures!!"

The Chia Pet

"Face it, Tim, that cute little Pet Rock you bought in 1976 is now a full-grown boulder - it's time to set him free!"

"The coffee is free, but now we rent the tables."

"I can't remember if I'm off red meat, or eating nothing but red meat."

"It's got my current Wordle winning streak on it."

"In this restaurant, quality control means I must approve every picture you take of the food."

"Years ago, there was only one Santa Claus. Now because of genetic engineering, there can be lots of them."

"I agree, a national conversation on privacy is wait! Yum...I've gotta share these pix!"

Selfie Acrobat

"Yes, Mom, I'm just finishing texting my payers now!"

"He's taking selfies again. More anesthesia!"

'Hey, man, that's not how we do the flash mob!'

Landmark selfie

'Enough with the eye of newt. Do you know how many calories there are in newt eyes?'

"I'm a big devotee of fasting."

Cat selfie

"Great stupid haircut!"

"It's sugar, fat, gluten and lactose free...They say it will help you live longer."

"Would it be possible for you to take a photo of my meal and post it on social media?"

"I need a five letter word that starts with 'Ca'."

If it had been today...

"That's a portrait photographer. He take youies."

"Sorry, but I don't see the 'Litter Box Challenge' going viral."

"What is your N-Ration?. . . Selfie per minute Narcissus ratio?"

"It's lactose-free! It's chemistry-free! It's free from animal by-products! It's the milk without milk!!!"

"I have a food intolerance - I can only eat photogenic food."

"Gluten free?"

Phone buff.

"Aren't you forgetting something?"

'Oh, c'mon, it'll be fun! Let's all go down and get tattooed and pierced!'