Modern Fad Follower Pillows

"That's a portrait photographer. He take youies."

"He's taking selfies again. More anesthesia!"

"What is your N-Ration?. . . Selfie per minute Narcissus ratio?"

"Would it be possible for you to take a photo of my meal and post it on social media?"

Jonah Takes A Selfie

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

Spontaneous Kombucha

"Like my new haircut?"

Manners And Customs Of Ye Englishe: A Pic-Nic

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

Bartlett's Unfamiliar Quotations

The Aging of Underwear

"I'm not sure cuteness counts as a core competency? but hey if it gets hits, you're on."

"Great, the end of the world and I'm going to be first on facebook with pictures!!"

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

"Port outbound, starboard home."

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

Sales - "For the last time, stop saving us money." (Colour)

A cow with a Brazilian.

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

The Pumpkin Spice Routes

"Enlightenment can only come when you realize there is more to life than gluten free hot sauce."

Lady imitating fashion

Smart 3 Piece Suite.

"If they fit, we can return them."

"The coffee is free, but now we rent the tables."

Man sees where he's at and he's 'Where It's Not At'

"What I'm looking for is a ten minute total makeover that doesn't change the essential me!"

"And the best part of grinding their bones to make your bread - totally gluten free!"

Loom Bands Craze: 'It's supposed to be a bracelet, Mum.'

"I don't regret going bald. I just regret growing bald before I had a chance to rock a man bun."

"We've gone 'Glutton-Free'."