Modern Entertainment Philosopher Gifts

'There's nothing on.'

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"Yes, you have given 100% to this company. But, over the five years you've worked here that's only 20% a year."

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

Martin Scorsese Roasts Your Fandom

The revolution that hit Hollywood hardest:The Thinking Pictures."

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

A man watches TV while wearing a Marshall McLuhan sweatshirt.

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

Who's torturing a crow? I'm practicing my play. It's art! Which opens your mind to life's important questions. Right. Like what is art? Or do we need little brothers?

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

'I ink, therefore I am....'

"I wanted to deliver a message of hope and tolerance in a complex global society but I decided to update them on the Kardashians instead."

'Stop quoting from films and get on with it.'

'How did he make the world in six days?'

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

The Last Jedi dvd is going to have fourteen deleted scenes! Horrible mistake. The confident creator releases his work to the world and says This is it. This is what I want to show you. He doesn't then show you all the stuff he might have put in the story. Did Prince release the deleted stanza from Little Red Corvette where he also compared her to a Ford Pinto? Wait ... Prince compared a sexy lady to a Ford Pinto? Who knows? That's my point. Aren't you glad you don't know what?

The Meaning of Life

"The truth? You can't HANDLE the truth!"

'I loved your argument. When are you planning to perform it again?'

Clever youth stating that he considers Shakespeare overrated

"I guess when you run out of Tooth Fairy teeth, you gotta go get a job!"

"This song is dedicated to all of you who have been having a hard time deciding between the big bang and steady state theories."

'In defense of rotten movies, they DO have the remarkable ability to make it seem like maybe your life isn't flying by that fast after all!'

Dancing with Jesus

"If you drink eight glasses of water every day, you'll due fully hydrated."