Entertainment Philosopher Gifts

Recent studies show that a man's fear of commitment extends to the television, where he suffers an unrelenting paranoia that something better is on another channel.

"Behold the secret to happiness."

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

'There's nothing on.'

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

Zenemies.

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

The man who invented the wheel/The man who patented the wheel.

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

Martin Scorsese Roasts Your Fandom

The revolution that hit Hollywood hardest:The Thinking Pictures."

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

'I suppose you're entitled to your opinion, but I still say that Shemp was the greatest of them all.'

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

'Stop quoting from films and get on with it.'

'I ink, therefore I am....'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

A man watches TV while wearing a Marshall McLuhan sweatshirt.

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

"I wanted to deliver a message of hope and tolerance in a complex global society but I decided to update them on the Kardashians instead."

Who's torturing a crow? I'm practicing my play. It's art! Which opens your mind to life's important questions. Right. Like what is art? Or do we need little brothers?

'How did he make the world in six days?'

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

"What if it's smarter than us?"

Human meat.

The Last Jedi dvd is going to have fourteen deleted scenes! Horrible mistake. The confident creator releases his work to the world and says This is it. This is what I want to show you. He doesn't then show you all the stuff he might have put in the story. Did Prince release the deleted stanza from Little Red Corvette where he also compared her to a Ford Pinto? Wait ... Prince compared a sexy lady to a Ford Pinto? Who knows? That's my point. Aren't you glad you don't know what?

The Meaning of Life

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

Seneca