Modern Art Aficionados Gifts

Selfie self-portrait

Doctor says: 'I must say, I'm surprised to see you here' to Magritte character with apple in face

'Projectile painting.'

Artist Eaten by Subject

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

The Artist

'It's my homage to Picasso.' (Snowman is all mixed up with eyes and nose in odd places)

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"Well....I could've done this!"

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Klimt Kiss Phones

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

Correct Comics *Drawn By A Vegetarian On Acid-Free Recycled Paper In A Drug-Free Environment

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

"You're welcome."

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

Cats at private view

Jackson Pollock Studio

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

Picasso: The Early Years

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

"How do I know this isn't a performance art piece?"

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

'I don't care if Jackson Pollock did start out this way. We are drawing kittens.'

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

"Tracy Island offers palatial splendour in the safest of environments. Your beds are unmade because this is Tracy Emin Island."

The Cremaster Cycle

Pouring all emotion into his art, Pablo had none left for his face.

Art Gallery.