Modern Art Admirers Gifts

"An exquisite diatribe against the conflagration of an urban elite."

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

The Artist

'It's my homage to Picasso.' (Snowman is all mixed up with eyes and nose in odd places)

"Well....I could've done this!"

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

'Projectile painting.'

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

Correct Comics *Drawn By A Vegetarian On Acid-Free Recycled Paper In A Drug-Free Environment

"You're welcome."

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

Klimt Kiss Phones

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

"How do I know this isn't a performance art piece?"

Picasso: The Early Years

Cats at private view

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

Jackson Pollock Studio

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

The Cremaster Cycle

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"Feel better, dear?"

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'

Art Gallery.