Mismatch Humor Lover Pillows

"Aw yeah, twist on the exhale! Twist on the exhale! Yeah yeah!!"

Classic Film Festival. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I told you it wasn't a buddy movie!

Tina's Nail Bar.

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

"What do you mean, there's no room for my stuff?"

"I like that everything is mismatched. I just think it could be mismatched better."

Alligator Bars

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!

"Yes, we know them. We like them, but we're not crazy about, you know, the other him."

"Looks like there was a mix-up. Apparently the tank we ordered went to Vinny's Joke Shop in Hoboken, New Jersey."

'Not that insect, silly! That's my husband.'

'My socks don't match, but neither me nor my socks care.'

"And they all said, twenty five years ago, that our trial seperation wouldn't last!!"

Google Translate for Marriagese

"I found the problem with your dryer. . . here are a bunch of socks you probably thought were lost!"

"But can you afford two tickets to Africa?"

'He popped the question last night. 'Who do you think will win the Cup?'

"Look, I've already told you. There's not enough room in the saucer to abduct your wife."

"What ever happened to 'Never go to bed angry'?"

'What the... I told the dating agency to send serious candidates only!!'

'I wish you wouldn't refer to me as your running mate!'

Angry wife and a drunken husband will need medical assistance.

"Ah, honey?" "Yes, sweetheart?" "You've left it in the drawer again."

Lateral thinking...thought bubble bypassing wife's head.

Piano tuner with an assistant.

"I left my wife today. Of course it was to pick up her dry cleaning and feminine products but it felt good."

Bad vibes next 3 miles.

Ernie, that's not what he meant when he said, "Listen closely to what I'm going to tell you."

"You've had a bad day? Try being stuck in this house!"

Guess what pants I'm wearing on this Zoom call.

Never let your girlfriend pack your parachute.

'Hmm, this wine is a lot like my wife; well aged but still bitter.'

Unsuitable hospital reading material.

Lost Property: "How can I help?"