Mishap Maven Gifts

"It's the airline. The luggage you lost seven years ago is still lost."

Workplace 17 Days Without An Accident

'No! That's not a wall safe, it's a porthole!'

"It's the first responders wondering when you'll be needing their services this weekend..."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 4

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"

"Why not pay someone to clean out the gutters?" "Total waste of good beer money." And just like that, Gail became a widow.

'I had the recipe upside down, so it's beefed corn.'

'I wish you'd told me your brother worked for the Mirror before we got him to do the wedding pictures.'

"Just what we've been looking for...a happy medium."

Psychic Research Unit.

"He had his binoculars back to front!"

"You’ll meet a beautiful woman whom your mother will loathe."

Doubling Gloucester Cheeses

'I thought you'd like to know the cat got down from the roof by itself.'

It had been a good life, filled with passion and joy, tender bonds, and finally one irretrievable error.

Discus accidents.

"And this one is made of ancient crystals that detoxify the air and remove all the money from your pocket."

"That's not what I said."

'You can't win -- I turned the water into wine, and then everybody wanted free refills!'

"Popular astrologer and psychic Malder Tercado's contract with a national Spanish-language TV network was not renewed. Tercado was reportedly surprised by the news...saying he didn't see it coming."

"And now, with the projected sales figures..."

"Maxwell, you idiot! You mailed copies of your last letter to our entire contact list."

When psychics fight.

Reading the Leaves.

'This time you hold the nail!'

"Oh no!"

"Once we get the performance figures in we give them to Mrs Miggins and her magic cauldron to make sense of them!"

"Yes I can read palms and if you don't remove yours from my thigh, you'll be reading my palm with your face!"

"Mr. Nwachuku?", "Extra dressing on the side?"