Safety Maven Gifts

Remember when "risk management" wasn't a thing.

'Actually, it's a fake, but I've never been mugged.'

'Why can't the make an aeroplane out of the same material as the 'indestructable' black box?'

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

'A problem with the Phase II trials. Everyone - all the people - was given the placebo, and no one got the drug.'

"Yeah, I know. bu tthe administration didn't want to appear culturally insensitive."

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

GQ Magazine: Stay at Home Special.

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

Man blending in to his chair is reading Optical Illusion Monthly magazine.

The end is near

Podiatry. The greated podiatrist of all time, you say? Yep. I studied at his feet.

News and Magazines. Tax Bill Debate. The trickle-down can never compete with siphon-up.

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

'I'm a practical nurse! -- I know better than to listen to doctors!'

'How could it have been rough for you back in Pharmacy school, Dad? You only had penicillin and aspirin.'

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

Celebrity Gavin Henson

Punch Magazine - "You've got a circulation problem."

Who Wore It Best?

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

Our parent company is not pleased with our work. They want all of us to register for a few remedial MBA courses.

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

'No! That's not a wall safe, it's a porthole!'

Hog magazine with litters to the editor dept.

Leisure Editor

Life is ghoul

"Bob put a chair with wheels on the table and climbed up to change a light bulb. Then the chair rolled away, Bob fell and... well, I guess we need a new industrial safety specialist."

'U.S. Manufacturing'

"These printers can be pretty self-righteous when they present their bills."

"It's 'Architectural Digest.' "

"Last chance, or Max here has ways of making you talk."

C Day Lewis.