Mischievous Siblings Pillows

Look out, you're sitting on a worm!

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

Bathroom Fairy

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

"It's magically delicious...especially when you sprinkle...Halloween candy on it!"

C'mon boy, speak! Speak!

'Oh, no! The monster under my bed is my brother!'

'Enjoy it while you can, kid...one day you wake up and you're five!'

'This is Kevin O'Shea, my big sister's answering service.'

'Well, would ya look at this, Martha? The dog's stealin' our cable. I told you this breed can't be trusted.'

Lesser Known Historical Figures: The Steno at the First Thanksgiving Dinner.

"I knew Mary would dump me when my fleece got a little gray."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

The Wolfman's Brother

President Trump blames loss of gravity on Democrats and China."

'No, she can not come out to play again.'

'Dad! What time is it when the big hand is on eight and the little hand is all over the floor?'

'What...you just sold your little sister?!'

'He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites.

"I'm wearing new cologne. I hope Smiley is able to control herself around me today."

"Gracie, get out of my room! Must I remind you that I am a martial artist in training?"

'Your brother sure ha some kind of weirdo creepy imagination.'

'Mom! Make him stop! -- he's trying to sell my dolls on eBay!'

"Why can't I give you a haircut?"

"Yeah...he's my brother. I inherited the cool genes!"

Those bubble wrap kids.

'Please leave your message after the tone...'

I'm beginning to see why they call these SELF-inking stamps'

"Do you ever just stop and think about all the disgusting things there are to put in your mouth?"