Mischievous Furball Host Gifts

Cats on the couch.

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

"I'm not napping yet, but I am getting ready to with a pre-nap warm up."

You're arrogant, aloof and spoiled...but I mean that in the nicest way.

"Projectile hairballing."

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Love means I narrowly chose you over a bunch of cats."

Fido and Fifi

"Don't you just love that new cat smell?"

Dog to other: 'I think I'm becoming quite addicted to pats on the head.'

'Wait a minute - isn't this one yours and that one mine?'

"In case you hadn't noticed, this is a multiple cat home!"

Violinist welcomed by cats

Menage a Paws.

Looks like this is the only contest Fluffy has a chance of winning today!

"The wings help. Now pick up the bowl and I'll chase it around the room a bit."

'Will work for tummy rub.'

What if cats talked dirty...

'She's killing me with kindness!'

'Hey, Dad! Kitty worked out how to use her new cat-door!'

"I can die at peace now knowing your toe nails are neatly clipped."

"It's a great property: the highlights are three cat-flaps, two litter trays, two scratch poles and of course, no bath..."

Chaos at the vet's office.

Cat wears jacket: "It's 100 per cent real furball."

"I have to go – it's time to feed the cat."

"Have some more tea, Mrs. Van Sickleford. Wendell is going to show you his mastodon tusk."

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

I just LOVE these giant mushroom caps. They can be real conversation stoppers just when you need them.

"The meaning of "crazy"? Well, it means "kind and caring" of course, like in the expression "crazy cat lady"..."

"I felt that there wasn't enough cat hair on your clean laundry so I decided to fix it."

"Anything, really. There's almost nothing I won't eat."

Cat about to get an injection from a vet.