Mini Memoirist Gifts

'This is the shortest autobiography I've ever read!'

I figured out how we can pay for the kids' college tuitions. Do tell. I'm going to leave for a year of self-discovery, which I will chronicle in a best-selling memoir. Oh, but

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"We have the exact same taste."

Tabletop Theatre

Display of political memoirs books categorized as: 'Non-fiction,' 'Fiction,' and 'Pure Fantasy'.

I'm currently working on my autobiography. Would you care to help make page 327 interesting?

It's an autobiography of a guy who spent his whole life trying to get his first @#^& book published. Editor.

'I did it all from memory.'

'I won't be writing this year, you can find my list on my blog.'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

Fifty Shades of Gray

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

'The end. Well, time for bed. What are you writing?'

"They called me Dumbo. A memoir of redemption."

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

'Oh, I'm just writing a tender memoir or my long ago affair with J.F.K...it's filled with pathos and sad wishful longing...'

Small child checks out a book.

'Man, I'm age 21 now and so far, I haven't done anything important. Things can't go on like this or I will have to forget my plan to become rich and famous by writing my autobiography at age 35!'

"What? Out of ink already? I just bought this pen."

"I'll give you a cookie if you promise to paint me as a pillar among women in your future memoir."

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

'You understand, of course, that my memoirs must be written in ELITE type.'

Eva Schloss

Rudy, I loved your memoir. It was fascinating. The way you overcame huge odds to invent the computer. How you went on to protect us from government surveillance. You know none of it's true. The way you swore yourself to humility. People so want to believe a good story.

'That's right...his appendix...and it's pure dynamite! Don't you see? It'll be the ultimate insider celebrity memoir!'

'I've read your manuscript-it's a miracle you survived all the booze, sex, and drugs while on your world tour, but are you sure you want it published during an election year senator?'

Woman at bookshop counter says: 'The Political Memoirs Wing is through there.'

'So there we were, driving to day care, when our van was attacked by a giant squid.'

"I loved your embarrassing personal essay in the 'Times.' "

My memoirs - 'I've character assassinated the target.'