Metaphor Muser T-Shirts

'Would you knock it off with the 'woulda-coulda-shoulda'!'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

Changing Room Decisions

God's map of the universe

A sailor in his little yacht bobbing on the waves

'Can Mr. Sloan call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

"Sorry, I can't - I have to be everywhere."

"So, while extortion, racketeering, and murder may be bad acts, they don't make you a bad person."

'It's called doctor-patient confidentiality. In layman's terms, you're paying me to keep my mouth shut.'

"You've got to want to connect the dots, Mr. Michaelson."

'I don't know - asceticism just doesn't seem like ENOUGH any more,'

"If I didn't worry all the time what would I do with myself?"

"I dreamed Lucian Freud was coming to paint us."

"I love it....but lose the bodies"

'Well the GOOD news is that the new software analyzed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product...'

"Oh, that's my cousin. I'm the Bluebird of Mid-Life Existential Despair!"

"You've got an inferiority complex, alright, but what's worse is...it's not a very good one."

Analyst has an ink blot on a card for a head.

'I was happier when I was unhappy.'

'You have to learn to face reality.', 'Can't I just sneak up on it?'

"Can't you ever relax?"

Barbershop customer's reflection mocks his haircut.

society of cartoonists...

'It's my dreams: I find them offensive.'

'Bit early for Surrealism, isn't it?'

"If a stock falls in the market and no one's around, does it really lose its value?"

I wonder if they can think...