Messy Situation Aficionado Pillows

Diner. Bottomless cup of coffee. Sounds messy.

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

'I'm just exercising my first amendment rights.'

"There, all neat and tidy!"

'Because of the mess, 'Mr. Potato Salad-Head' never took off.'

Bad Interview Technique

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

'You could say this is how my husband and I support local arts.'

'The sleepover was great Mum: Timmy's house is a pigsty just like ours...'

"Can't we just go after sailfish...?"

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

"Perhaps it was wrong to say 'May our company become a home to you'..."

'How do I know your ours?'

'You're honoured, Mr. Coombes - He won't do that for just anyone!'

'I'm all about quantity.'

'We were mud wrestling.'

"My decorating style is more like 'Flung Shui'."

"One checker, two packs of cigarettes, two screws, one teapot bird, one piece of coal, three lighters, one Christmas light, one clove of garlic, four boxes of matches, two books, three pieces of broken dish, eggshells, one saltshaker peg, one pen, one cre

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

'You have to clean it yourself. There is no delete key.'

'Cleanliness may be next to godliness, but with Jimmy it's next to impossible.'

'What do you expect Marjorie, I am a grub.'

'I hope I'm not intruding...'

'You're not what we hand in mind when we advertised for a new organist.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

"No, it's not burglars dear, it's only Samantha looking for the chocolate biscuits!"

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

Stamped

"Undress down to your underwear and have a seat. The optometrist will be in shortly."

'I didn't hear about any oil spill on the news!'

Duncan made a real faux pas when he heard that his blind date was expecting a baby.

Dr. Miska: Eye, Ear, Nose and Embarrassing Bodily Functions.

'Anyone can arrange a blind date, only truly great ones can arrange a whole relationship.'