Awkward Situation Enthusiast Pillows

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

'Ever get the feeling we've overstayed our welcome?'

'What I'm about to say, Miss Pomeroy, may shock and disgust you....'

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"I'll tell you why she's got to come in - she's my wife!"

Don't look down, just keep making eye contact...

"You seem to have won Dad over but Mum might be a bit of a problem."

'Y-y-yes-s....she's about your size.'

"The interview was going great until she noticed on my c.v. that I was her ex husband."

"I didn't want to embarrass them by telling them I don't work here, so I told them it was a three-hour wait for a table instead."

'Hi there!... I know, that you know, that you know me from somewhere. But I'm not going to remind you, because I'm enjoying your look of excruciating embarrassment far too much!'

'I appreciate your being a pal to me, Dad, but double-dating is just going too far.'

'I was going to say see me afterwards Miss Jones but of course you are seeing me afterwards.'

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

"Hi, there. I'm Dick. Are you seeing anyone?"

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

'We've got a special this week on nose hairs!'

Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...

Bad Interview Technique

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

Time management office worker

"It's not what you think."

"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"

The Consequences of an Interrupted Shower.

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"I think that one is a little too honest."

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

"And with that being said Polly became dinner." "Polly wanna cracker?" "Polly wanna piece of yo mama's sweet behind." "Oh boy..."