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'Sorry Trevor, but I don't date people I work with.'

'My wife is out of town for a few days.'

'We've got a special this week on nose hairs!'

Bad Interview Technique

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

"It's not what you think."

As years of unspoken tension surfaced, Trunky refused to raise his hand like a coward.

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

"Previously on..."

"And with that being said Polly became dinner." "Polly wanna cracker?" "Polly wanna piece of yo mama's sweet behind." "Oh boy..."

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

'Excuse me, Mr. Pavlik, but that gentleman you called an idiot is here. Should I still say you're not in?'

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

'I hope I'm not intruding...'

"I really think I can handle this date on my own."

"There's a little jelly or something on your chin."

'See, I told you my dad would like you.'

Colin had heard that women liked honesty in men.

Shy Man at Party

"I made a big mistake getting into ladies underwear..."

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

'Now that's what I call a worthy cause.'

Adoption centre nurse accepting a bribe from a pack of wolves

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

"I could see my mating dance had caught her eye, so I put more energy into it, but I ended up sweaty and out of breath: she lost interest then. . ."

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

"Undress down to your underwear and have a seat. The optometrist will be in shortly."

He couldn't put his finger on it but something told Colin the date wasn't going well.

''Change your underwear.' Hmm, my mother must be in town for a visit.'

'Oh no! I think I left my wallet in the examination room.'